my heart

I feel like... gee, how do I explain this? ok, try to follow me here...

I feel like my heart is a broken china glass that has been repaired. haha what a weird comparison. anyhow, I feel like before I didn't know how to receive from people any kind of compliments or good things. I just physically could not accept it. I wasn't used to it and I didn't have a compartment for receiving, if that makes any sense. then someone hastily pasted the broken piece back into place and I was able to receive some but a lot still leaked through. even retaining that little bit was foreign to me. I'm still waiting for that piece to be permanently replaced on the cup... but yeah, that's how I feel. it's hard for me receive cuz I'm not used to it. even someone just being thoughtful of me sometimes throws me off guard and I don't know how to react. pitiful...

anyhow, I'm still learning to accept & receive people's thoughtfulness... whether in words or help. don't try to force it on me cuz I WILL argue with you. (I like to argue... haha) but if I receive it, you should take it as a compliment. :)

anyhow, enough about that... it was just a thought cuz of some stuff that happened yesterday and I was thinking about it.

not much going on in my life right now. same ol', same ol'. work, work, school, work, eat?, sleep?. I'm ready for a vacation...

wow, I think my brain actually froze. I can't think of anything to say. that is quite rare. so I guess I'll go now and leave you to things more interesting than me rambling about nothing.