peace

before I start writing anything, I need to say that I LOVE Kenny Peavy's voice!!! I know, I know. I say that to people all the time. but really, his voice is up there in my top 5. seriously! right now I'm listening to some live worship of his from here at HRC. gosh, I love it! hmmm... maybe that's why the first time he co-led worship here I went up to him between services and asked him "can we keep you?!?!" yes, I seriously said that! Jinder was laughing at me... I was just saying what everyone was thinking! :-P anyhow, his worship really blesses me and he's in my top 5 of voices (not that you care or anything). I think I could listen to him, Third Day, Creed and Daughtry all day and never get tired of hearing their voices. :-D ok, so that's not why I'm writing a blog... but I had to say it cuz I'm listening to him now and I was thinking it.

anyhow... so this week God has been teaching me a lot about peace. I know we all have some measure of anxiety in our life and it varies from one issue to the next. well, an "issue" came up with me that I thought would cause me a lot of anxiety and fear and worry. but in the end, God's used it to teach me a lot about just sitting and waiting for His will to be fulfilled. I don't know what that looks like, but it's not for me to worry about. whether things happen as I want them to or whether it's quite the opposite, it doesn't matter. God is in it all. He knows what He's doing and I'm where I need to be for this moment in time. why is life playing out like this? I have no clue... of course I'm a little kid when it comes to stuff like this and I turn to God begging "but WHY?!" usually He doesn't tell me and encourages me to wait. usually I'm too impatient to wait. or rather, the fear comes in. what if it doesn't turn out how I want it to? what if I never get this opportunity again? what if I screw it up? what if? what if? what if? well, God is BIGGER than my what ifs and He can work it all out to THE BEST possible situation. was that easy for me to believe? nope. but He finally broke through my fears and trust issues and desires and I finally realized that all of those problems were not only stupid and lame but showing that I didn't have faith in Him. with one slash of a sword all of that crap has disappeared. at least in this situation. I feel so much peace and light that I know no matter what happens in the end I'll be happy about the result. I don't understand it, but I accept it.

ok, I'm getting pretty hungry and I need to do a few other things before leaving internet land... so I'm gonna go. hope this blog meant something to you.